changes//

i'm not sure whether i can legitimately blame weight gain on exams. i'm pretty sure there's no statistical correlational evidence suggesting that my exam has caused 6lbs to magically appear on my body, but perhaps there is. the evidence is well, evident on my body anyhow. you know that kind of weight gain you can feel creeping up on you, but you choose to ignore?

i'll be honest and say i've managed to ostrichize this issue and put it to the back of my mind, away from biosocial gender explanations and 8+16 marks of evaluation. the problem is that now, the rest of the issues have floated away (along with potentially my future) so i'm having to face this.

it's not that i don't want to - i love exercise (once i'm back in a routine of doing it) and i have previously been waaaay lighter than i am now (both physically and mentally) so i'm kind of excited to  get back into a routine.

it's just the motivation of starting.

i used to be able to go to the gym and burn 1300 calories 4 times a week - sure, i would feel it massively afterwards and may or may not have been suffering from a slight eating disorder but nonetheless i was fit. and light(ish).

i think i'm gonna aim to use this blog to not only channel my creative expressions (and probably quite a few not so creative ones) but to motivate myself. as of today (12th june 2014) i have approximately 100 days before i start university of sheffield, as long as i get my grades. that's gotta be motivation enough, right?