dupes//

Sunflower Shorts: Left: American Apparel £54 // Right: Ebay £10.79
'Leaf' (we all know it's not a leaf) Print Dress: Left: Ebay £6.09 // Right: Motel Rocks £32
Bandage Bikini: Left: Ebay £8.97 // Right: Agent Provocateur £195
All White Bikini: Left: Triangl £47 // Right: Ebay £9.98
Cleated Sandals: Top: Ebay £24.99 // Bottom: Vagabond £65
Sunglasses: Top: Henry Holland £150 // Bottom: Ebay £5.45

ebay has been absolutely marvellous when it comes to replica items recently. i'm not sure, as a blogger, i should be supporting buying dupes of things (and in all honesty as i haven't been paid yet i can genuinely say i haven't bought any) however in terms of financial ability it does make buying supposed 'luxury' items much more affordable.

this is where it comes down to style vs quality. obviously, if you're after a pair of durable, long lasting, sun blocking glasses then out of the two, it's far better to buy the genuine henry holland ones. however, if it's simply the design and desire to own a pair for the aesthetic appeal then the dupes make far more sense.

i'm fully aware that dupes are a contribution to the high cost of the designer options, but in my eyes it's a paradox. normal, average consumers can't afford to throw away £150 on a pair of sunglasses, so the good fellows in china do us all a favour and create identical ones for a fraction of the price. in turn, the price of the originals goes up to support the lacking buying amounts, and the circle starts again.

it could also be said that some things on the list are expensive purely for the brand name. american apparel thigh highs, as a perfect example, are not worth £20 in production value. aa are unique in the sense that they pay high wages to their staff and this is reflected in their prices, but in my mind if i was after thigh highs i'd definitely buy the ebay equivalents rather than the aa £20 ones.

generally i guess it's down to the individual's choice - do you save your money or support a genuine company? i suppose the answer should be an obvious one, but for shoppers like myself with minimal spending allowed, the dupes do look far more tempting.

bbc3's murdered by my boyfriend//

i never usually write reviews, but watching something so.. strong has pretty much convinced me to do so.

murdered by my boyfriend is a drama on BBC3 showing the demise of a young girl as she's taken over by her boyfriend. as the name suggests, we know how it's going to end, but that doesn't make it any less shocking.

i consider myself relatively heartless but watching this has genuinely bought me to tears.

i think it's because of the strength of the character portrayal; ashley (the girlfriend/subject of abuse) is lively, chatty, popular. she doesn't fit any sort of stereotype behind the usual idea of 'abused'. reece (our abuser) does fit the representation somewhat.

the drama as a whole is very cleverly put together. the fact that it's a true story simultaneously kills me, and urges me to do anything i can in the future to lower domestic violence rates. it's all well and good everyone saying 'if my boyfriend was to hit me i'd leave him straight away'. everyone can say it, but in practice it's a whole different matter. not that i have any experience in this area, but watching and being in ashley's shoes throughout the programme does enlighten viewers into a real life situation for it.

that's the only thing missing from the programme in my opinion - although i can see where ashley is coming from when she takes reece back, i would do the opposite; run. obviously this is only from a viewer's point of view (it's gotta be completely different in 'real life' so to speak) but repeatedly taking someone abusive back is never going to end well. i'm 110% aware this is the most narrow minded view point ever, but i think, along with the help of this programme, more women (and men) will be able to see the long term prognosis of being in a relationship like that.

as a character, reece is dislikable straight away. his demeanour, his glances, his behaviour and attitudes towards ashley. that's no two way relationship - that's subtle abuse at its best. following on from this, the programme shows the friends in two different lights. on one hand, they are supportive - they urge ashley to leave reece and tell her they'll protect her. on the other side though, they don't do enough - although how much can you really do?

it could be argued that the statistics are the most shocking part. 229 women in four years are murdered as a result of domestic violence. that's just over one woman a week. 

one woman a week is killed for being herself. because, realistically, that is where domestic violence is rooted from. however you try to phrase it, the cause is the same. one woman a week is murdered. i can't get over that.

my favourite thing about this programme is the awareness it brings to such a big issue. there are now hundreds of tweets/comments, meaning there are now a lot more young people who know the details of these things. the more people become aware, the less taboo it becomes to tell someone 'my boyfriend punches me' and the more can be done about it.

watching 'murdered by my boyfriend' has definitely sparked my interest (if you can call it that) into domestic violence and has encouraged me to challenge it and fight against it as a journalist. 

holography//

shopper bag

skirt

platforms

shorts

sliders

nail varnish

clutch 

t shirt

i love the current holographic trend going around everywhere at the moment. as someone who also enjoys 'rave' (excuse the cringy term) music, i think the holographic style is a great way to incorporate both music and fashion into one. it's also pretty versatile; depending on how it's styled, it can be worn to events, or to tesco - and who could say no to that?

i think the trick with this type of 'pattern' (can you class it as a pattern?) is to pair it with something plain. a good example of this is the t shirt shown; holographic sleeves with a plain white top. it's also the kind of top that doesn't require a necklace, or at least not a statement one.
i think it would be best paired with black skinny jeans and white air force trainers, or possibly dressed up with the sliders if you're more adventurous!

i'm trying to incorporate more of this kind of thing into my wardrobe so watch this space shortly after payday.

summer goals//

this post may be pretty overdue - my summer started on 11th june this year due to finishing my A2 exams early (or not early, considering the amount of stress i went through!)

hopefully, in about 2 and a bit months i'll be starting at University of Sheffield for my BA Journalism degree. exciting, right?

the only thing i'm worried about is not being prepared enough; there's so much i want to do in my life, some of which i can quite easily do after my degree (assuming i get in.. arghhh) and others that i want to start now (because i'm impatient and essentially have a long time this summer)

- lose weight. this alone is long overdue - i remember back after i finished gcses this was my plan then..oops. two years on and i'm near enough the same weight. slightly more toned but nonetheless the same weight. i am so determined to change this, if nothing else, before i start! i keep trying to motivate myself with things like 'you can buy -insert desired object here- when you've dropped -insert appropriate number- here' but it never lasts - said item enters the sale, i lose the will to live and consequently stay the same, just slightly poorer and with a new top, for example.

- start learning shorthand. one requirement for a professional journalist is to be able to short hand at 100 wpm which at the moment is looking impossible. i'm a fast (if semi illegible ) writer but the prospect of learning it in near enough a new language is kind of scary. i have three years to perfect my shorthand skills but there's nothing like starting early!

- i also want to maximise this summer, as i've realised this is the only summer in my life (possibly) where i have 4 months without anything to do. previously there's always been the idea of starting next year's work early, but i don't know for sure where i'm going to be, as of september, which is scary but also a positive, in that i can spend the time doing as i please.

- read more! i used to spend my life reading, before banning myself for the sake of revision (and longterm; my future). my aim now is to read a lot more books, more classics and widen my knowledge generally.

- go on holidays, go to festivals, go to parties, travel a lot. i feel like this is a few points merged into one. i'm already going to egypt and fuerteventura, so expect travel journalism fresh from the other sides of the world in a month or so's time! i'm hopefully going to both sundown and shakedown festival which should be amazing. i think if i have any spare days (and let's be realistic, i probably will) then i'm going to spontaneously hop on trains and take myself around the uk with the help of my student railcard.

essentials//

i'm slowly getting my summer wardrobe together in the hope that by the time my holidays/uni arrive, i'll have a good stack of decent clothes.. one can hope!

i'm attempting to also rid my wardrobe of colour. i love the whole monochrome look at the moment, along with tropical prints (which don't often come in monochrome.. hmm)

i had to make an exception with the palm tree dress as i basically fell in love with it, along with the lilac and teal tropical shorts but i'm 110% sure they'll get their wear.

if i keep working as much as i am currently (i.e not much this week but loads next week) then i should build up the $dolla$ to fund my shopping habits. it's been weird having to restrain myself from online shopping recently due to no cash so i'm waiting on next payday (29th june i'm looking at you) as a sort of reward for all my 'ahem' hard work..

it's an endless cycle really; spend money, save money, get bored of the clothes i own, and repeat.

let's also all appreciate how creased my clothes look and pretend that i put time and effort into this post, rather than typing hurriedly before i lose motivation to go work out.

PLAYLIST#1

animals / martin garrix
higher ground / tnght
turn back time / sub focus
workout / andy c
tsunami / dvbbs & borgeous
ready for your love / gorgon city
smash tv / chase and status
mercy / kanye west
too late / major look
we like to party / showtek
all the wrong places / example
stronger / kanye west
no problem / chase and status

changes//

i'm not sure whether i can legitimately blame weight gain on exams. i'm pretty sure there's no statistical correlational evidence suggesting that my exam has caused 6lbs to magically appear on my body, but perhaps there is. the evidence is well, evident on my body anyhow. you know that kind of weight gain you can feel creeping up on you, but you choose to ignore?

i'll be honest and say i've managed to ostrichize this issue and put it to the back of my mind, away from biosocial gender explanations and 8+16 marks of evaluation. the problem is that now, the rest of the issues have floated away (along with potentially my future) so i'm having to face this.

it's not that i don't want to - i love exercise (once i'm back in a routine of doing it) and i have previously been waaaay lighter than i am now (both physically and mentally) so i'm kind of excited to  get back into a routine.

it's just the motivation of starting.

i used to be able to go to the gym and burn 1300 calories 4 times a week - sure, i would feel it massively afterwards and may or may not have been suffering from a slight eating disorder but nonetheless i was fit. and light(ish).

i think i'm gonna aim to use this blog to not only channel my creative expressions (and probably quite a few not so creative ones) but to motivate myself. as of today (12th june 2014) i have approximately 100 days before i start university of sheffield, as long as i get my grades. that's gotta be motivation enough, right?